One Year Ago

One year ago today I found out I was pregnant. I just *knew* I was and was expecting to see that line on the test. If I wouldn’t have I would have been devastated. If I wouldn’t have, we were going to start saving for InVitro.
It was a Sunday morning and I was at the summerhouse. I went back to bed and showed it to Steven. I wanted to make sure he saw the line too. (When you pee on a stick as much as I used to, you easily start seeing things) He was happy but very reserved. We were both being cautious. After all I had gotten pregnant 3 times before this and 3 times we were severely disappointed. So, it wasn’t that brand new, “Oh My God, I’m pregnant” feeling. It was more like, “Yay! Let’s hope it works this time.” And it did!!! Now we have a beautiful, happy, healthy almost 4 month old baby girl! Our miracle baby.

Today’s Mardi Gras-one of my favorite holidays-and I’m at work. I think it’s the 1st one I’ve ever missed. I didn’t even remember until I saw a commercial this morning. Crazy how things change. It’s sad missing out, but all my focus is different now. I was reading about how friendships change when you have kids and it’s so true. This is a little out of context, but basically it said that we are selfish before kids-and boy was I…I’m still selfish but it’s Gracie-centered now and not me-centered. Here’s the link if you want to read it: http://wondertime.go.com/parent-to-parent/article/the-great-divide.html
I suggest it for those with kids and especially those without.

I got to work late today because Gracie has some kind of rash on the back of her knees. Turns out it is eczema. Poor baby. But still she woke up happy, cooing, and squeaking at me:) She’s getting more fun everyday. So, I’m working on mardi gras; we have no money; I’m worried about my milk supply and really worried about how much I’ll miss her when I leave for the cruise. I could complain about all that, but I won’t. I just try to think about all the great moments we have and will have with her.

I’m so lucky.